Homesickness is tough, especially when a member of the family works overseas as an OFW (Overseas Filipino Worker). It affects both the OFW and the family back home. But don’t worry, we’ve gathered some advice from OFW families who’ve been there, done that, and found ways to make the distance feel a little smaller. They’ve shared their personal experiences and practical tips that can help you cope with being apart.
The Reality of Homesickness for OFWs
Being far from home is more than just missing your comfy bed. It’s about missing the everyday things – the taste of your mom’s cooking, the sound of your kids laughing, and even the little arguments that make you feel like you belong. For OFWs, this homesickness can hit hard. It can lead to feeling down, unmotivated, and even physically sick. Understanding that homesickness is a normal part of the OFW experience is the first step to managing it. According to a study about mental health among OFWs that was published by the Philippine Statistics Authority, a significant percentage of OFWs reports experiencing feelings of loneliness and isolation. This feeling can often manifest as difficulty focusing on work, and decreased productivity.
One OFW, Leticia, who works as a nurse in the UK, shares that her first few months were the hardest. “I missed my family terribly,” she says. “I would often cry myself to sleep. It felt like a part of me was missing.” She learned, however, to find ways to fill that void.
Practical Communication Strategies
Staying in touch is key. But it’s not just about sending a quick text message. It’s about making meaningful connections. Here are some ideas:
- Schedule Regular Video Calls: Don’t just rely on text messages. Set up regular video calls – maybe once a week – where everyone can see each other’s faces. Leticia schedules a weekly video call with her family every Sunday. “It’s our ‘family day’ even though I’m miles away,” she explains. “We eat our meals together (virtually), share stories from the week, and just catch up.” Tools such as WhatsApp and Viber can be utilized for calls.
- Create a Shared Photo Album: Technology makes sharing memories so much easier! Create a digital shared photo album where anyone in the family can upload photos and videos, regardless of location or distance. It could be on Google Photos, iCloud, or any shared storage app. This makes everyone feel united.
- Use a Family Calendar: Keep everyone in the loop by using a shared family calendar. Mark important dates like birthdays, anniversaries, school events, and appointments. Seeing these dates makes the OFW feel more involved in everyday life at home. Maria, an OFW in Dubai, says, “It helps me plan my calls and send gifts in advance.”
- Online Games: There are numerous online games that can be played together even when apart no matter where you may be. Board games, puzzles, sports and many other categories offer a unique way to spend time while not physically beside each other.
Creating a Home Away from Home
For OFWs, creating a sense of “home” in their new country can significantly ease homesickness. This doesn’t mean forgetting about the Philippines; it means building a life and finding comfort in their new surroundings.
- Cook Familiar Filipino Dishes: Food is a powerful link to home. Learning to cook your favorite Filipino dishes can be incredibly comforting. Even better, share recipes with family members back home and cook together over a video call! It can be a bonding experience and a way to recreate familiar tastes and smells. Find a local Filipino store to buy ingredients that are reminiscent of home.
- Decorate Your Space with Photos and Mementos: Surround yourself with reminders of home. Print out photos of your family, display Filipino artwork, or bring souvenirs from the Philippines. These small touches can make your living space feel more personal and less foreign.
- Connect with Other Filipinos: Joining a Filipino community group or organization can provide a sense of belonging and support. You can share experiences, celebrate Filipino holidays, and find new friends who understand what you’re going through. Many Filipinos can speak the same language.
- Establish a Routine: Having a predictable routine can provide stability and structure, which helps to combat feelings of unease and loneliness. OFWs state that consistent work & exercise routines give them a sense of grounding and keeps them happy with a sense of accomplishment.
Helping the Family Back Home
Homesickness isn’t just an OFW problem. The family left behind also experiences separation anxiety and loneliness. Here are some ways to support them:
- Designate Responsibilities: Ensure that responsibilities are clearly defined after the OFW leaves. Who will handle the bills? Who will take care of the kids’ school activities? Having a clear understanding of roles minimizes stress and prevents misunderstandings.
- Schedule Family Activities: Even though you’re not physically present, try to arrange family activities that you can participate in remotely. This could be as simple as watching a movie together over a video call or reading a bedtime story to your children.
- Give the Children Extra Attention: Children often struggle the most with the absence of a parent. Spend extra time talking to them, listening to their concerns, and reassuring them that you love them and will always be there for them. Don’t just focus on providing materials things— your time is the greatest gift you can give to your children, even if you’re miles away.
- Send care packages: Send care packages that provide happiness to the family. You can send them gifts, Filipino culture reference books, or anything that reminds you of them. Be sentimental, and make sure the packages are personalized.
Dealing with Financial Pressures
Financial stress can worsen homesickness. It’s important to address financial concerns openly and honestly.
- Create a Budget: Work together to create a realistic budget that outlines income, expenses, and savings goals. This provides a sense of control and reduces financial anxiety.
- Avoid Unnecessary Spending: It’s tempting to splurge on material things to compensate for the absence of the OFW. However, this can lead to financial problems down the road. Focus on saving for the future and investing in things that will benefit the family long-term.
- Seek Financial Advice: If you’re struggling with financial issues, consider seeking advice from a financial advisor. They can help you create a plan to manage your finances effectively and achieve your financial goals.
- Keep a gratitude journal: Studies show that being grateful helps people become more optimistic, which helps alleviate stress. Make sure to journal about your experiences, feelings, and positive thoughts during the homesickness period to combat depression.
Mental Health is Key
It’s crucial to prioritize mental health for both the OFW and the family. Don’t hesitate to seek help when needed. The World Health Organization (WHO) has resources on mental health for migrant workers and their families.
- Acknowledge Your Feelings: It’s okay to feel sad, lonely, or anxious. Don’t try to suppress your emotions. Acknowledge them and allow yourself to feel them.
- Talk to Someone: Share your feelings with a trusted friend, family member, or counselor. Talking about your struggles can help you process your emotions and find solutions.
- Practice Self-Care: Take care of your physical and mental well-being. Exercise regularly, eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, and engage in activities that you enjoy.
- Limit Social Media, Set Boundaries: While social media can help you stay connected, it can also negatively affect your mental health. It is best to use social media sparsely and only when needed, and make sure your social media accounts are not filled with comparison or toxic content.
The Power of Positive Thinking
It might sound cliché, but having a positive attitude can make a huge difference. Focus on the reasons why you are an OFW. Focus on the future you’re building and the opportunities you’re creating.
- Set Realistic Goals: Don’t put too much pressure on yourself to achieve everything at once. Set small, achievable goals that you can work towards. Celebrating these small victories can boost your morale and motivation.
- Focus on the Positive: Instead of dwelling on the negative aspects of being away from home, focus on the positive aspects, such as the opportunity to earn a better income, learn new skills, and experience a different culture.
- Find Purpose in Your Work: Remind yourself why you chose to become an OFW. Focus on the impact your work has on your family’s lives. This can give you a sense of purpose and motivation.
- Learn the language and culture: As an OFW, one of the best ways to acclimatize yourself to a foreign environment and combat isolation is to immerse yourself to it. Even while not fully integrating, showing acceptance and open-mindedness will bring a positive outcome.
OFW Success Stories: Inspiration from Others
Hearing about other OFWs who have successfully coped with homesickness can be incredibly inspiring. Many stories circulate online and within OFW communities which are easily accessible and very inspiring. These stories highlight that while the journey has challenges, and with the right strategies, it is possible to thrive and achieve your goals.
One story is about Ricardo. Over time, Ricardo, a construction worker in Saudi Arabia, initially struggled with severe homesickness. But he eventually joined a local Filipino basketball team which gave him a support network and a sense of community which changed his mindset. He now encourages other OFWs to find a hobby or activity that they enjoy to combat loneliness.
Then there is also the story of Lita, an OFW caregive in Canada. She was able to overcome the homesickness by making use of every spare minute to learn new skills as she takes online courses. She is now studying to become a certified nursing assistant. Lita emphasizes the importance of personal growth and continuous learning to stay motivated and positive while working abroad.
Planning for the Future
Remember, being an OFW is not forever. It’s important to have a plan for your eventual return home. The Commission on Filipinos Overseas (CFO) offers programs and services to help OFWs prepare for reintegration.
- Invest Wisely: Invest your earnings wisely to ensure a comfortable future for your family. Consider investing in a business, property, or other assets that will generate income.
- Develop New Skills: Use your time abroad to develop new skills that will be valuable upon your return. Take online courses, attend workshops, or volunteer in your community. This will increase your employment opportunities and make your transition back home easier.
- Maintain Strong Family Ties: Continue to nurture your relationships with your family members. Stay connected through regular communication, visits (when possible), and participation in family events. This will ensure that you have a strong support system waiting for you when you return home.
FAQ Section
Here are some frequently asked questions about dealing with homesickness as an OFW:
What are some common signs of homesickness in OFWs?
Common signs include persistent sadness, loneliness, anxiety, difficulty concentrating, changes in appetite or sleep patterns, and a feeling of being disconnected from your surroundings. You might also experience physical symptoms like headaches or stomachaches.
How can I cope with homesickness during holidays and special occasions?
Holidays can be especially tough. Plan ahead and find ways to celebrate, even from afar. Schedule a video call with your family members, cook a traditional Filipino dish, or participate in a local Filipino community event. Remember, it is the intention and the memory that counts in the moment. Don’t feel bad when you are not physically present.
What can I do if my child is struggling with my absence?
Children need extra reassurance and attention. Make sure to schedule regular video calls, listen to their concerns patiently, and reassure them that you love them and will always be there for them. Send them handwritten letters or small gifts to show them you’re thinking of them.
Where can I find support groups for OFWs?
Many Filipino community organizations and churches organize support groups for OFWs. Check with local community centers, online forums, and social media pages. The Philippine Embassy or Consulate in your location may also have information about available support services.
What are some resources to help OFWs prepare to return home?
The Commission on Filipinos Overseas (CFO) offers various programs and services to help OFWs prepare for reintegration. You can find information on their website about financial management, entrepreneurship, and skills development. Additionally, the Overseas Workers Welfare Administration (OWWA) provides assistance to returning OFWs. Also, your local Philippine Embassy or Consulate can provide information about returning processes. Make sure to always seek updated information.
References
Philippine Statistics Authority. (Date). Mental Health Study. Manila, Philippines.
World Health Organization. (Date). Mental Health Resources. Geneva, Switzerland.
Commission on Filipinos Overseas (CFO). (Date). Reintegration Program. Manila, Philippines.
Instead of letting homesickness dictate your OFW journey, why not take the first step towards a happier, fulfilling experience? Start by scheduling a regular video call with your loved ones. Cook a familiar Filipino dish this week. Connect with a Filipino in your area. Most importantly, remember why you started this journey in the first place. You have the strength and motivation within you to overcome the hardships and create a better experience for the family back home and an uplifting experience for yourself. You deserve to thrive while achieving your dreams abroad!
