Being an Overseas Filipino Worker (OFW) is both a sacrifice and an act of love. Separated by distance, OFWs and their families face unique challenges. But by holding onto or creating meaningful traditions, you can keep the family bond strong and vibrant, even with miles in between.
Sharing Stories: The Long-Distance Storytelling Tradition
One of the most crucial ways to keep your family connected is through consistent and engaging communication. It’s more than just asking “How are you?” It’s about sharing the small details of your daily life – the funny things that happened at work, the delicious meal you cooked, or the beautiful sunset you saw. These seemingly insignificant details paint a picture of your life for your family back home and help them feel like they are still a part of it. For instance, instead of just saying “Work was okay,” you could say, “You won’t believe what happened at work today! My coworker brought a huge plate of homemade adobo and everyone was fighting over it! It reminded me so much of Mama’s cooking.” Descriptive storytelling makes the distance feel smaller.
Encourage your family back home to do the same. Ask specific questions about their day: “What was the best part of your school day, anak?” or “Did Lola tell any funny stories today?” Schedule regular video calls specifically for story-telling. Think of it as your family’s long-distance version of gathering around the dinner table.
Celebrating Special Occasions: Making Birthdays & Holidays Count
Birthdays, anniversaries, Christmas, New Year – these are significant milestones in family life. Being away during these times can be especially tough for OFWs and their families. But with planning and creativity, you can still make these occasions special. For birthdays, consider sending a personalized video message where each family member shares a special memory or a wish for the birthday celebrant. You can also arrange for a surprise delivery of flowers, cake, or a special gift. There are many online services that can handle deliveries in the Philippines, making it easier to send your love from afar.
During Christmas, many families in the Philippines participate in the Simbang Gabi, a series of dawn masses leading up to Christmas Day. If you can’t physically be there, you can still participate virtually. Many churches stream their masses online. Afterwards, you can have a video call with your family and share a virtual salu-salo (feast) while opening gifts together. Or, a simpler approach is to plan a virtual movie night. Even time zones can cause some to start movies earlier or later to be together.
For all holidays, sending cards or handwritten letters is a classic and heartfelt gesture. In this digital age, a physical card can be a tangible reminder of your love and presence.
The Power of Pasalubong: A Tradition of Love
The tradition of pasalubong (souvenirs or gifts brought back from travels) is deeply ingrained in Filipino culture. It’s a way of showing your loved ones that you were thinking of them while you were away. While you may not be able to bring back pasalubong every time you communicate with family, saving for the bigger trips can be worth your while. It doesn’t have to be expensive; even small, thoughtful gifts can be meaningful. A keychain from the city you live in, a local snack, or a handcrafted item can show your family that you remember them and are thinking of them even when you’re far away.
More than the material value, the pasalubong represents your effort, your sacrifice, and your love for your family. It’s a tangible symbol of your connection to them, bridging the gap created by distance.
Regular Family Meetings: Staying Involved in Important Decisions
Being an OFW doesn’t mean being absent from important family decisions. Schedule regular family meetings via video call to discuss important matters such as finances, children’s education, or family health. This allows you to stay informed, contribute your input, and show your family that you’re still actively involved in their lives. Prepare an agenda beforehand so you all have clarity and direction. As an example, review a budget so others get your perspective on some aspects of spending. The Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas offers resources on financial literacy that could be helpful during these meetings. BSP Financial Literacy Program offers many resources and materials to help families manage finances effectively.
These meetings also provide an opportunity to address any concerns or conflicts that may arise. Open and honest communication is key to maintaining healthy family relationships, especially when you’re miles apart.
Supporting Education: Investing in the Future
For many OFWs, providing their children with a good education is a top priority. Actively supporting your children’s education is a powerful way to show your love and commitment to their future. This goes beyond just providing financial support. Stay involved in their studies by setting aside time to help them with their homework, attend parent-teacher conferences virtually, and celebrate their academic achievements.
Many OFWs do the equivalent of “back to school” activities with their children. They will purchase uniforms, books, and school supplies online and have the delivery scheduled. This is a very simple way to show your support. Actively use technology to help your children be as successful as possible in school. Celebrate their academic accomplishments with small rewards or gestures of appreciation. According to a study by the Philippine Statistics Authority, education is a major motivation for Filipinos working abroad. Philippine Statistics Authority provides data on OFW deployment and their demographics, providing insights into their motivations and challenges.
Celebrating Cultural Traditions: Keeping Filipino Values Alive
Even while living abroad, it’s important to preserve and celebrate Filipino cultural traditions. These traditions are an integral part of your family’s identity and heritage. Teach your children about Filipino history, language, and customs. Cook Filipino dishes together, sing Filipino songs, and celebrate Filipino festivals.
Consider enrolling your children in Filipino language classes or cultural programs. This will help them connect with their roots and develop a sense of pride in their heritage. Sharing these traditions can also be a way to connect with other Filipino families in your community abroad, creating a supportive network of fellow OFWs.
Creating New Traditions: Adapting to the Distance
While it’s important to hold onto existing traditions, don’t be afraid to create new ones that are specific to your situation as an OFW family. For example, you could establish a weekly “virtual movie night” where you watch a movie together online, or a monthly “virtual game night” where you play online games together. There are many collaborative games and services that bring enjoyment and togetherness that otherwise distance may hinder.
Another idea is to create a family scrapbook or photo album. Ask each family member to contribute photos and captions that capture important moments in their lives. This can be a fun and creative way to preserve memories and strengthen your family bond. A simple approach is to use an online photo storage service. Sharing a folder and requesting family member contributions can add a new depth to the digital scrapbook.
Prioritizing Quality Time: Making Every Moment Count
When you do get the chance to visit your family, make the most of it. Put away your phone, disconnect from work, and focus on spending quality time with your loved ones. Plan activities that everyone will enjoy, such as going on a picnic, visiting a tourist attraction, or simply spending time at home playing games and talking. The United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs has studied this and other similar topics. United Nations DESA conducts research on international migration, including the impact on families and societies.
Remember, it’s not about the quantity of time you spend together, but the quality. Make every moment count and create lasting memories that will sustain your family until your next visit.
Open Communication: Talking About Feelings
Open and honest communication is the backbone of any strong relationship, and it’s especially important for OFW families. Encourage your family members to share their feelings and concerns with you, and be willing to listen without judgment. Create a safe space where everyone feels comfortable expressing themselves.
It’s also important to be honest about your own feelings. Being an OFW can be emotionally challenging, and it’s okay to admit that you’re feeling lonely, homesick, or stressed. Sharing your struggles with your family can help them understand what you’re going through and offer their support. Regular check-ins and heartfelt conversations can make a world of difference.
Financial Transparency: Building Trust and Security
Financial transparency is crucial for building trust and security within your family. Be open and honest about your income, expenses, and financial goals. Involve your family in financial planning and decision-making. This will help them understand the sacrifices you’re making and appreciate the value of your hard work.
Teach your children about financial literacy and responsible spending. This will equip them with the skills they need to manage their finances wisely in the future. Furthermore, consider giving them small responsibilities to encourage good habits. Set clear expectations and boundaries regarding finances to avoid misunderstandings and conflicts.
Seeking Support: Building a Community
Being an OFW can be isolating, so it’s important to seek support from other Filipinos in your community. Join Filipino organizations, attend Filipino events, and connect with other OFWs online. Building a strong support network can provide you with a sense of belonging and help you cope with the challenges of living abroad.
You can also find support from family members and friends back home. Stay in touch with them regularly and share your experiences. Knowing that you have people who care about you and support you can make a big difference in your well-being.
Planning for the Future: Working Towards Reunification
Ultimately, the goal for most OFW families is to be reunited permanently. Start planning for your return home as early as possible. Set financial goals, develop a career plan, and research opportunities in the Philippines. Having a clear plan for the future can provide you with a sense of hope and motivation.
Talk to your family about your plans and involve them in the decision-making process. This will help them feel more secure and optimistic about the future.
FAQ Section
How can I deal with homesickness as an OFW?
Homesickness is a common experience for OFWs. To cope, try to connect with other Filipinos in your community, participate in Filipino cultural events, and cook Filipino food. Schedule regular video calls with your family and friends back home. Focus on the positive aspects of your life abroad, such as new experiences and opportunities. Consider joining online OFW groups.
How can I stay involved in my children’s lives from afar?
Stay involved by scheduling regular video calls with your children, helping them with their homework, and attending parent-teacher conferences virtually. Send them cards and letters, and surprise them with gifts on special occasions. Always be available to listen to their concerns and offer support.
How can I manage my finances effectively as an OFW?
Create a budget and track your expenses. Set aside a portion of your income for savings and investments. Be wary of scams and high-interest loans. Seek advice from a financial advisor if needed. Send remittances through reputable channels.
What are some ways to celebrate Filipino culture while living abroad?
Cook Filipino food, sing Filipino songs, and celebrate Filipino festivals. Teach your children about Filipino history, language, and customs. Join Filipino organizations and attend Filipino events. Share your culture with your friends and colleagues from other countries.
How can I prepare for my eventual return to the Philippines?
Start saving money for your return. Develop a career plan and research job opportunities in the Philippines. Stay informed about the Philippine economy and job market. Talk to your family about your plans and involve them in the decision-making process.
References
Bangko Sentral ng Pilipinas. Financial Literacy Program.
Philippine Statistics Authority.
United Nations Department of Economic and Social Affairs.
Don’t let distance weaken your family ties. Embrace these traditions, create new ones, and always remember that your love transcends borders. It’s time to strengthen your family relationships. Start today by setting aside time for a heartfelt conversation with your loved ones. Make sure they know your devotion despite the distance.
