When a family member, especially a parent, decides to work overseas (as an Overseas Filipino Worker or OFW), it changes everything. Suddenly, the everyday routines, the family meals, and even the simple goodnight hugs are replaced with video calls and yearly visits. It’s tough, no doubt about it. That’s why building a strong support system is super important. It’s like having a safety net for the family left behind, and it helps the OFW feel more secure knowing their loved ones are okay.
Why Support Systems are a Big Deal for OFW Families
Imagine a house built on shaky ground. Eventually, it’s going to crumble. An OFW family without a support system is kind of like that. When mom or dad is working far away, the family needs extra strength to stay strong. This is where a good support system comes in. It can help in many ways, making life easier and less stressful for everyone.
Think about it. Who helps with the kids’ homework when the parent who usually does it is away? Who takes care of things when someone gets sick? Who’s there to listen when someone is feeling lonely or sad? These are the moments when a support system makes a huge difference. A strong support system can ease the stress and anxiety brought by the long distance separation. According to the Philippine Statistics Authority, in 2022, there were an estimated 1.96 million OFWs. This figure alone highlights the widespread need for strong support systems due to the inherent challenges of overseas work.
Different Parts of a Good Support System
A support system isn’t just one thing; it’s like a team made up different players. Ideally, the team includes family, friends, neighbors, and even community groups. Each one plays a different role in supporting the family.
- Family: Grandparents, aunts, uncles, and cousins are often the first line of support. They can help with childcare, run errands, and provide a sense of family.
- Friends: Good friends are like family, too! They can offer emotional support, a listening ear, and a fun distraction when things get tough.
- Neighbors: Having neighbors you can count on makes a big difference, especially for everyday things. They can keep an eye on the house, help with emergencies, and offer a friendly face.
- Community Groups: These can include religious organizations, OFW family groups, and parent-teacher associations. They provide a sense of belonging and access to resources.
Building Your Own Support System: Practical Steps
Okay, so you know why a support system is important, but how do you actually build one? It’s not as hard as you think! Here are some simple things you can do:
Start with What You Have
Look around! Who do you already know and trust? Maybe it’s your parents, siblings, close friends, or neighbors. Start there. Reach out to them and let them know about your situation. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. Sometimes, people want to help but don’t know how. Being clear about what you need makes it easier for them to step in. For example, you can say, “I’m having a hard time getting the kids to school on time with away. Would you be able to help me with that a few times a week?”
Join Community Groups
Check out local churches, community centers, or even online groups for OFW families. These groups are a great way to meet people who understand what you’re going through. You can share experiences, get advice, and make new friends. The Overseas Workers Welfare Administration (OWWA) often has resources and programs for OFW families that you may want to explore.
For instance, many religious groups organize activities specifically for children and families of OFWs, helping them stay connected to their faith and community. Also, there are online forums and Facebook groups connecting OFWs and their families, offering a platform for shared experiences and emotional support.
Be a Good Neighbor and Friend
Building a strong support system isn’t just about what others can do for you; it’s also about what you can do for them. Offer to help your neighbors or friends when you can. If you see someone struggling, reach out and offer a hand. This will build trust and make people more likely to help you when you need it. Even small acts of kindness go a long way. Like offering to watch a neighbor’s child for an hour or bringing over leftovers to someone who’s sick.
Communicate Clearly and Often
This is super important! Keep the OFW in the loop about what’s happening at home. Share both the good and the bad. On the other hand, the OFW should also tell the family about their life overseas and how they’re feeling. Clear communication helps everyone feel connected, even when they’re far apart. It’s also important to communicate your needs to your support system clearly. Don’t assume they know what you’re going through or what you need help with. Be specific and direct.
Regular video calls and messaging apps can make a huge difference in maintaining family bonds. Schedule regular times for these calls so everyone knows when to expect them. During these calls, try to focus on sharing everyday experiences, not just discussing problems. Talk about what you ate for dinner, what you did at school, or funny things that happened during the day. These small details help maintain a sense of normalcy and connection.
Don’t Be Afraid to Ask for Help
Sometimes, we think we have to do everything ourselves. But that’s not true! It’s okay to ask for help when you need it. It doesn’t make you weak; it makes you smart. Recognizing when you need support and reaching out for it is a sign of strength. If you’re struggling with something, talk to someone you trust. Whether it’s a family member, a friend, or a professional counselor, talking about your feelings can make a big difference.
What About the OFW?
While this article focuses on the families left behind, it’s important to remember that the OFW also needs a support system. Living and working in a new country can be very stressful. It’s important for OFWs to connect with other OFWs, join cultural groups, and find ways to stay connected to their home country. Many OFWs find comfort and support in connecting with fellow Filipinos abroad. These connections not only provide a sense of community but also a platform for sharing experiences, advice, and support.
Staying in touch with family back home is also crucial for the OFW’s well-being. Regular calls, messages, and even sending care packages can help them feel connected and loved. Also, OFWs should prioritize their own physical and mental health. Eating healthy, exercising, and getting enough rest are essential for coping with the challenges of overseas work.
Challenges in Building a Support System
It’s not always easy to build a support system. There can be challenges, like:
- Distance: Some family members may live far away, making it hard to get practical help.
- Busy Schedules: Everyone is busy, and it can be hard to find time to connect.
- Cultural Differences: Sometimes, different generations or cultures have different ideas about what support looks like.
- Lack of Trust: It can be hard to trust people, especially when you’re feeling vulnerable.
But don’t let these challenges stop you. Be patient, persistent, and creative. Look for solutions that work for you and your family. This might include scheduling regular video calls with distant family members, using online tools to coordinate help with errands, or finding ways to connect with people who share your values and beliefs.
Making Your Support System Stronger Over Time
Building a support system isn’t a one-time thing; it’s an ongoing process. Here are some tips for keeping your support system strong over time:
Show Appreciation
Let the people in your support system know how much you appreciate them. Say thank you, offer to help them in return, and let them know they’re making a difference in your life. A simple thank-you note or a small gift can go a long way in showing your gratitude.
Stay Connected
Make an effort to stay in touch with the people in your support system, even when you don’t need anything from them. Call them, message them, or meet up for coffee. Maintaining those connections is very important.
Be Reliable
Be someone that others can count on, too. If you offer to help someone, follow through. Being reliable builds trust and makes people more likely to support you in the future.
Reassess Regularly
Your needs and circumstances might change over time. So, it’s a good idea to reassess your support system regularly. Take a look at who’s in your support system, what they’re able to offer, and whether you need to make any changes. For example, as children grow older, their needs may change, and you’ll need to find new sources of support to meet those needs.
Examples of Support Systems in Action
Let’s look at some real-world examples of how support systems can help OFW families:
Case Study 1: Grandma to the Rescue
Maria’s husband, Jose, works in Saudi Arabia. Maria was struggling to balance her job with taking care of their two young children. Her mother, Lola Elena, moved in with them. Lola Elena helps with childcare, cooking, and household chores. This allowed Maria to focus on her job and spend quality time with her children. Lola Elena also provided emotional support to both Maria and the children, helping them cope with Jose’s absence.
Case Study 2: Friends Helping Friends
When her husband, Ben, started working in Canada, Sarah felt isolated and lonely. She joined a local moms’ group and made some close friends. They supported each other by taking turns babysitting, carpooling to activities, and providing a listening ear when someone was feeling down. These friendships helped Sarah feel less alone and more connected to her community.
Case Study 3: Community Stepping Up
After Rico’s father started working in Singapore, the family struggled financially. Their church organized a fundraising drive to help them pay for school supplies and other necessities. The church members also volunteered to tutor Rico and his siblings in their studies. This community support helped Rico and his family stay on their feet during a difficult time.
The Role of Technology
Technology can be a huge help in building and maintaining a support system, especially for OFW families. Video calls, messaging apps, and social media can help you stay connected to loved ones, no matter where they are in the world. Online groups and forums can provide a sense of community and access to resources.
Make sure you leverage available digital tools for communication and coordination. For instance, create a shared calendar using Google Calendar to schedule tasks and appointments, ensuring everyone is aware of the family’s activities. Using messaging apps, create a family group chat and smaller groups for various concerns to facilitate quick and efficient communication.
FAQ Section
Here are some frequently asked questions about building support systems for OFW families:
Q: How do I start building a support system if I’m new to an area?
A: Start by exploring local community groups, churches, and organizations that align with your interests. Attend local events and activities, such as community fairs, markets, and workshops. Engage in conversations with neighbors during neighborhood gatherings, and participate in community initiatives. Volunteer in local programs to meet people and make a positive impact.
Q: What if I don’t have family nearby to help?
A: Focus on building relationships with friends, neighbors, and community members. Join local groups and organizations to meet new people. Consider hiring a babysitter or caregiver if you need help with childcare or eldercare. Building up close friends is key if relatives are not nearby. Also, explore support groups for the family members of OFWs.
Q: How can I support my family back home when I’m working overseas?
A: Stay connected through regular communication – set up regular video calls to talk about your day and theirs. Send remittances and financial support to help them with their expenses. Offer emotional support by listening to their concerns and offering advice. Plan visits home when possible to maintain close family bonds. The Psychological Association of the Philippines shares that maintaining connections through communication and regular remittances helps mitigate some of the negative psychological effects of separation.
Q: How do I deal with feeling guilty about leaving my family to work overseas?
A: Acknowledge your feelings of guilt and sadness. Focus on the positive aspects of your decision, such as providing a better future for your family. Talk to a therapist or counselor if you’re struggling to cope. Stay connected with your family through regular communication. Remember that you’re doing what you believe is best for your loved ones. Many organizations also offer grief or separation counselling for OFWs and their families.
Q: Should I tell my children about the challenges I’m facing overseas?
A: It’s important to have age-appropriate conversations. Protect young children by avoiding exposing them to complicated financial or relationship stressors. For teenagers, being more open about your struggles can assist them to better understand and appreciate your work. Make sure to discuss feelings openly and honestly; keep the OFW’s and family members’ mental health always be the priority.
References:
Philippine Statistics Authority. (2022). 2022 Survey on Overseas Filipinos.
Overseas Workers Welfare Administration (OWWA).
Psychological Association of the Philippines.
A strong support system is not a luxury; it’s a necessity for OFW families. It can ease the stress and loneliness of separation, strengthen family bonds, and help everyone thrive, even when living apart. Building a support system takes time and effort, but it’s worth it. It’s the best investment for your family’s well-being and happiness. So, start building your support system today. Reach out to your family, friends, neighbors, and community groups. Let them know what you need, and offer your support in return. And remember, you’re not alone. There are many people who care about you and want to help. Take that first step and discover the power of community.
